Spasmodic...

Why is it always me that attracts the total weirdo’s? There I am standing at the bus stop being perfectly normal waiting for the bus to Cardiff when some old lady approaches me. She starts with the usual ‘’is this the Cardiff bus stop’’ To which I think ‘Bloody hell I hope so’ but being polite I answer her question with a simple ‘’yes.’’ Assuming my answer was enough I step back and continue to text *****. The next thing I know the lady is back in my face telling me how all the buses are spasmodic these days and how I shouldn’t trust any of them because the drivers told her they are all too spasmodic to be trusted. I have to say at this point I did start wondering about her sanity but there we have it. Clearly she wasn’t going to leave me alone so it was just a case of waiting there like a nodding dog until she left for a different bus.

            Now I daresay you are wondering about *****, as you clearly have nosyitis reading somebody else’s journal. ***** is my boyfriend! Yes, you read that last sentence correctly I do in fact now have a boyfriend. How did I go about it? Well, over Christmas I was incredibly bored and just a little bit miffed that I didn’t have anybody boyfriendy to share it with so I signed up to a website called plenty of fish. Yes, I know what you’re thinking. I’m not as much of a crazy tool as people may think. I started speaking to a few of the guys on there and they all turned out to be complete and utter jerks, either that or they had a very small brain capacity. Flaunting lack of spelling and grammar knowledge or showing off their torso (that probably wasn’t even theirs) wasn’t exactly the kind of thing I had in mind when I signed up. I was about to give up hope of finding anybody decent when I received a message from *****. After reading his profile and pondering over whether his pictures were him or not I decided it was worth a shot and messaged him back. All over the Christmas period and into January we messaged backwards and forwards before he gave me his number. Several texts later it was decided that we would meet up in Cardiff and go for a drink before moving on to the ice rink.

            The day of our meeting came and I was absolutely dying inside with nerves. When he walked up and said ‘’Hello ****’’ I couldn’t even speak. I knew he was tall…After all I read his profile which stated he was six foot three but when there’s six foot three worth of person standing beside you it seems a whole lot more than tall. Our date went well though apart from the misfortunate event at the ice rink involving my hand and his crotch. We were skating around holding hands, as you do, when I tripped on my toe pick and launched forwards. Being the nice person that he is, ***** pulled me back so I didn’t fall and supported me but it was too late. I swung around and somehow my left hand grabbed his crotch area. I have never wanted to die so much in my life as I did that moment. I could feel people’s eyes boring into my back as they stood giggling. To this day he still teases me about it but it’s all in good humour so I should forgive him I guess.